Living Unoffended: The Power of Humility and Love

In a world where everyone seems to be vying for the title of "most right," it's easy to fall into the trap of self-righteousness. We often pride ourselves on being smarter, more moral, or more enlightened than others. But what if our pursuit of being right is actually hindering our ability to love and make a real difference in the world?

Let's consider a powerful parable from Luke 18:9-14. Jesus tells the story of two men who went to the temple to pray - a Pharisee and a tax collector. The Pharisee, confident in his own righteousness, stood apart and prayed, "God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get."

In stark contrast, the tax collector stood at a distance, unable to even look up to heaven. He beat his breast and said, "God, have mercy on me, a sinner." Jesus concludes by saying that it was the tax collector, not the Pharisee, who went home justified before God.

This parable illustrates a profound truth: it's not just about being right or wrong, but about the condition of our hearts. Pride and humility play a crucial role in our spiritual lives and how we interact with others. The Pharisee was technically "right" in his actions, but his heart was full of pride. The tax collector, though a sinner, approached God with humility and received justification.

As followers of Christ, we can easily slip into the mindset of the Pharisee, believing that our job is to be right about everything. We become offended by those who don't share our beliefs or values, and if we're not careful, that offense can turn into contempt. We start to hate not just what people do, but who they are - a dangerous place for any disciple of Jesus to be.

But here's a challenging thought: what if you're right, but you're not loving? What if your approach discounts your rightness? Jesus was concerned with both right and wrong, but He was equally concerned with pride and humility. The tone and approach matter just as much as the content of our message.

Consider Jesus Himself. He was perfect and sinless, yet sinful people were drawn to Him. Why? Because Jesus didn't make them feel wrong; He made them feel loved. In John 13, we see a beautiful example of this. On the night before His crucifixion, knowing that one of His disciples would betray Him, Jesus washed His disciples' feet - a task usually reserved for servants. Even in the face of betrayal, Jesus chose to love and serve.

After this act of humility, Jesus gave His disciples a new commandment: "Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another" (John 13:34-35).

This is a powerful reminder that people aren't drawn to Christ by our moral superiority or how right we are. They're drawn by love. Jesus didn't say people would know we're His disciples by our correct theology, our political stance, or our social media posts. He said they would know by our love for one another.

So why do we often fail to love others the way Jesus loved us? Perhaps it's because we're too busy being right. When we start with a prideful stance of always being right, we set off a negative cycle. We feel morally superior, which leads to being judgmental, which in turn makes us easily angered and offended.

But what if we started from a different place? What if, instead of beginning with "I'm right," we started with "I'm forgiven"? This shift in perspective leads to profound gratitude, which makes us more accepting of those who are different or even wrong. From this place of acceptance, we can overflow with love and continue in a posture of forgiveness, gratitude, and grace.

The apostle Paul emphasizes this point in 1 Corinthians 13:1-3: "If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing."

In other words, we can have all the right knowledge, all the right actions, all the right beliefs, but if we don't have love, it's all meaningless.

Remember the story of the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11)? The Pharisees were technically right - the woman had sinned. But Jesus, the only one without sin and thus the only one with the right to judge her, chose not to condemn her. Instead, He showed her love and mercy, telling her to "go and sin no more." His approach made her feel valued, seen, and loved in spite of her sin.

As we navigate a world full of complex issues and differing opinions, let's remember that we're not called to be right above all else. We're called to speak the truth, yes, but to do so in love. We're called to be humble, recognizing that we too are sinners saved by grace. We're called to love others as Christ loved us - sacrificially, unconditionally, and with great humility.

So the next time you find yourself in a disagreement or faced with someone whose beliefs or actions you find offensive, pause and ask yourself: Am I more concerned with being right, or with loving well? Am I approaching this situation with pride or with humility? Am I making a point, or am I making a difference?

Let's strive to be people who lead with love, who are quick to forgive, slow to judge, and always ready to extend grace. For it's not our rightness that will change the world - it's our love.